After you read the 3 sample essays, please leave a COMMENT on this post responding to the following questions. Comments are due by class time on Wednesday, August 31.
- What did you notice about each of the student examples?
- How did each writer structure their story?
- What choices did each writer make that you found compelling, interesting, attention-grabbing, emotionally-moving, or otherwise positive?
- What unusual or creative choices did they make?
- Which parts of the story gave you some kind of emotional reaction?
- What choices did the writer make in how they crafted their story that CAUSED that reaction in you?
After reading all three sample essays, I noticed that all of them had something in common; not wanting to admit something. Whether it was sexuality, a feeling of not belonging, or not wanting to acknowledge something that’s due soon, they all share that common ground. Each writer also used a kind of timeline to arrange their work. What interested me most, was how the author of “Lesbian” described her childhood crush. Her descriptions of how that person made her feel, how she finally mustered up the courage to admit that she was lesbian, made me really admire her. With “Q”, their feeling of inadequacy is something I can well relate to since starting college. And with “This I No Longer Belive”, their procrastination is something that I could link to my daily life. I think their use of the prompt was very unusual, as you wouldn’t typically write about the actual assignment as the assignment, but his choice of words and structure gave a meaningful take on procrastination. What really got to my emotions though, was how the narrator in “Lesbian” struggled so much during her upbringing to accept who she was. I can relate to her a lot, perhaps not in the same way, but I can remember various times where I kept a part of myself hidden because I was too scared of what others might think. Overall, all three sample essays had a great impact on me and I’m glad I had the opportunity to read all of them.
I never made that connection (that all 3 are about not wanting to admit something)! What a great observation
After reading all three sample essays I can say each person had some type of realization or conclusion. None of the writers knew how they were going to go about the future. We, the audience, receives some type of backstory whether it’s from when the writer was 5 years old, being a new resident of New York City or a student a few days before writing their first draft. I noticed that the essay about moving to New York wasn’t as serious as the girl who was having trouble expressing her sexuality. I found myself laughing at the expectation vs. reality of living in New York City. The expressions used were more comical to me than anything else but were also true. Olivia’s essay hit home for me because I’m a professional procrastinator. I felt and lived just about every word that was typed. I also want to acknowledge how she was able to turn not having any ideas into a piece of work. I think her essay can be read by majority of students everywhere. The essay “Lesbian” really made me think about how much people don’t want to be different. When you are younger kids are especially mean, and they don’t lie. I find that it’s easy to follow others because it isn’t exactly easy to be different. You’re making your own path and with that means there isn’t a blueprint to follow. This essay really made me think about the personal journey people have to go through and how long they have been dealing with it.
After reading the sample essays, I have noticed that all three of the essays take on a unique approach to different topics. For example, the author of the essay “This I No Longer Believe” clearly highlights and emphasizes multiple times throughout the essay their “disdain” for the prompt. On top of that, the author mentions, also multiple times, the fact that he/she procrastinated to write this essay, which is something that we all can relate to, in fact, it is something I am doing with this assignment. Similarly, the author of the sample essay “Q” provides accurate descriptions of NYC that we all experience, on a daily basis. This is something that I found compelling and unique in such an essay.
After reading each of the sample texts it became clear that the subject matter of each writing piece was extremely personal and authentic which created a range of familiarity within the slightest feelings portrayed by each piece. For example the social tensions of living as a teenager in “lesbian”, the harrowing reality of New York City in “q” and the general struggles of pursuing any activity worth while in “this is I no longer believe” are all themes that one can easily connect with. Furthermore when reading the pieces, this is i no longer believe in particular, has the quality of being so brutally honest. Especially within the context of the writing assignment example, the problem in her reality of overcoming her weaknesses is displayed in the paper itself.
After reading the sample essays, I noticed that they all come through a realization about the problem they face as the reader progresses to the end of the story. This can be seen when in “Lesbian”, the writer at first struggles to admit that she is a lesbian but as the reader progresses through the essay, the writer explains how because she read James Baldwin and how he faced the controversy related to his sexuality, she was somewhat inspired to be confident in hers. In “Q”, the writer at first conveyed their thoughts about NYC as they detested living there by writing how “If you want Beyonce and Broadway and Central Park then you want everything to smell like burnt piss and rotted lettuce”. Even after noticing every bad thing about NYC, the writer realizes that they want to stay. For “This I No Longer Believe”, the writer starts off how they procrastinated their draft until the last day because it seems very easy to do. However, as the last day to write the draft arrives, the writer then comes into a realization that the draft was not in fact easy but difficult. In the end, the writer then realizes that the problem was that things that seem easy to do might not actually be so. Along with these sample essays having this “realization” in common, the structure to their essays are somewhat similar as well. They all start off with a problem and as the reader progresses through the essay, the solution or lesson is then found in the end.
The essay Things I no longer believe was repetitive. The author kept on talking about not having an idea to write about and putting off work till the last minute. The essay had a little bit of chronological order to it. The author structured the essay in a way that he started off talking about what was going through in his mind a couple of days earlier from the current day, then he resumes to the current day and just dives into his emotions and explains his situation. The author made this extremely relatable and because of that, I felt an emotional connection with this paper. Made an extremely creative choice of just rambling off instead of finding a legitimate thing to write about the prompt. In the essay Q, the author included a lot of detailed explanations of New York City. I noticed that the author has a hate-love relationship with NYC, but more towards the love side because she is excited to see how things play out in the future. I also noticed that the author uses antithesis to show differences between NYC and where she originally came from. The essay was structured to be a mixture of narrative and descriptive. I really liked this essay as it had relatability to it, not in the sense that I do not like New York City, but in the sense that I Love NYC even after considering the numerous flaws. I also thought this essay had a bit of humor in it. In the essay lesbian, I noticed that the author is afraid of admitting that she is a lesbian, or at least she was afraid. She didn’t want to admit that she was different. This essay was also quite detailed. The author gave detailed explanations of her crush and also how she got the courage to come out and admit that she was a lesbian. We are able to see the social tensions that the author faces being a lesbian through the explanations and short narratives that the author presented in this essay.
From reading the sample essays, I’ve noticed that each student has had an incredibly personal story to tell, that is simultaneously also relatable to some audiences. Procrastination, being in the closet, and especially the mixed opinions about living in New York are separate experiences that many different groups of people face. The structure of the stories were informal, which made it much more compelling to read because of the intimacy behind the writing. I found it attention-grabbing in “Q” when the author’s tone shifted quickly from the romanticized version of New York, versus the harsh reality of it. The relatability of how terrible the transportation system is made the piece more intriguing to read more about. In “Lesbian,” the constant repeat of the word lesbian, as well as the run-on sentences displaying panic were an interesting choice to incorporate, whilst in “This I No Longer Believe,” the utterly blunt tone of the essay made it comical to read. “Lesbian” was more of an emotional read for me personally, as another member of the LGBTQ+ I can truly empathize with the fear for rejection, simply because of how demonized same-sex relationships have become. The uneasy tone throughout the essay, and the buildup to the reveal of a life-long secret was what elicited a reaction from me.
They all told their stories on how they came to terms with things. Each writer also organizes their work to show what they learned over time. The author of “Lesbian” described how her reaction to the word lesbian varied when she was placed in these various contexts. And, as a result of the reactions of those around her, her perception of the term shifted. I can relate to this section because I went through my own journey of discovering my sexuality and how my surroundings altered how comfortable I was with being out. “Q’s” sense of not belonging is something I experience anytime I change environments, such as the transition from high school to college. Their procrastination is something I strongly feel with “This I No Longer Believe.” I have a terrible procrastination problem, and no matter how many times I realize that it never ends well, I continue to procrastinate. I had an emotional reaction to “Lesbian” since I connect with her in many ways, including feeling at peace with my own sexuality.
After reading the 3 sample essays I noticed that each of the student examples were extremely personal, more than that, candid. Like taking a peek inside a snippet of one’s life or sneaking a glance at a page of their life diary, and it felt like this was done purposeful. The structure for their stories were all seemingly started from the middle of their experience (aside from “Lesbian”), truthfully I agree with the notion that “there’s no other way to say it than to say it” and here I see it holds true and is in fact, successful in grabbing my attention, but what came after retained it. Details. Vivid descriptions of environments, movements, and emotions are all something I enjoy drowning myself in when reading. From when the writer of “Q” describes the female drivers face as she approaches her car, her features to her emotions, to in “Lesbian” where the author seemingly filled with nostalgia, recounts memories of her youth with friends. As mentioned before I believe the “unusual” choice all the authors made was being truthful, candid about emotions since that is what drives all humans and our stories. Each part of the story that usually brought out this emotional reaction from me was the description of how each author felt in that moment of time. The confusion, frustration, denial, all powerful emotions that drive us to do great feats. I think this reaction was caused mostly, as stated before, were details. These authors did not shy away from them and I think that is what caused the appeal to me, and their success as writers.
I noticed that all three seemed to utilize internal monologue in a specific way. This is especially showcased in “Q” and “Lesbian”. Both writers of “Q” and “Lesbian” seemed to structure their writing to ensure their internal thoughts were highlighted by using them to develop the story even more. I think that’s what grabbed my attention the most, especially in “Lesbian”. The actions and words portrayed internalized homophobia and denial only through the explanation of the writer’s internal monologue, which would usually come directly after said action or words.
What I noticed about each of the student examples was that each of them took their own journey to reveal something about themselves. From the Q train to being lesbian to writing an essay they self explored by using personal experiences or even personal tendencies. Each writer had a chronological order and they used a lot of imagery to portray their emotions and that led to having a tone of curiosity. In the story “Lesbian” she emphasizes the word lesbian to create a norm around the world as in the beginning of the story it talked about being younger the norm was liking the other gender and the public views seeing the word lesbian with a negative connotation but later on she rediscovered herself and realizes it okay to be different as she is confident for who she is and believes being different should be the norm. The story about writing an essay gave me reinsurance as sometimes I too have the same mindset about it. The choices that the writer made to feel connected to the story was that the topic was relatable and was told from the point of view of a student.
Reading all 3 essays I concluded they all had the same opinions but different ways of expressing themselves. “Lesbian “ the writer definitely went through struggles as a teenager living in nyc and wasn’t ready to admit her sexual because she didn’t want to be stigmatized, which a lot of us go through.” Q” I can definitely relate to this . I commend the writer because it gave a good explanation of how New York is and we go thru, I recently moved to New York For school and left my parents back home and I hated it and people made me feel like I was not at home . “This i no longer believe “ definitely is about procrastination and as students we can definitely relate to this a 100%
All three writer were specific about what they are talking. They gave the detail about real like story. They were informal about their language, style, and tone. They were all confuse about their future.
As I was reading the essays, there was a theme of struggling to accept something that’s been consistently hard to deal with and which is eventually accepted by the writers due to a moment of realization. The essays all follow the same structure of the issue being introduced by the beginning and the writers going more in depth of why its such a prominent problem, then ultimately showing how the authors mind is changed because of a realization. For instance, in “Q”, the writer struggles to accept that NYC isn’t what she had imagined, and uses curse words to describe the disgusting and vile side of NYC. She comes to realize though, that this is exactly everything she’s been anticipating and that she should try to accept the worst of the city so she can wholly experience the nice side. Similarly, in “Lesbian”, the author starts the essay off by bringing up how wrong she felt about being a lesbian, and how she felt like she had to throw that side of her away because it wasn’t normal. This was until she read about James Baldwin and his similar experience, but noticed that he accepted it for himself to be happy. That’s when she decided it was indeed okay to be a lesbian. The structure of the last essay was mostly the same throughout the entirety of it, but the struggle and acceptance of it was still shown, especially when the author realizes that what he’s feeling is normal for most in his same position and decides that it is in fact meaningful enough to talk about because others can relate to it. Other than the structure, I also noticed that all of the authors used a certain way of writing to make it almost sound like the reader is physically there, experiencing and hearing what the author was feeling and thinking, word for word. They also use certain words to create a more vivid image, along with the use of repetitive words to drill into the readers how that word affected the author; this was done with the word “lesbian” to make the readers understand the impact the single word had on the author. All of this is done to pull the reader into the authors shoes, making them feel each emotion the way the author did.
When reading the student essays, I realized that they all described their feelings clearly to create a sense of familiarity and relatability to the audience. “Q” was about how the reality of New York didn’t live up to the writer’s expectations. I think many people can relate about how reality never meets up with their expected standards. “Lesbian” was about a girl finally finding her true self and being proud of it. Many readers can relate to this or at least hope to relate to this one day because it’s about finally finding their true selves and not being afraid to hide it anymore. “This I No Longer Believe” is about procrastination which I’m sure most people, if not everyone, can relate to.
After reading each of the sample texts, it became clear that the subjects of each writing piece were extraordinarily intimate and authentic, which produced a spectrum of familiarity within the smallest sensations given by each piece. In “Lesbian,” “Q,” and “This is I No Longer Believe,” for example, one can readily identify with the social challenges of youth, the scary realities of New York City, and the general difficulty of pursuing any worthy pursuit. Unquestionably, the writing process itself is what gave these writings their honesty, which, in my opinion, promotes a critical approach to one’s own identity. Every word contains a range of emotions and personal experiences; I have always thought that this is a really healing and cathartic component of creative writing. By fully expressing our thoughts, feelings, and ideas through creative means, we develop a sense of self-awareness that infinitely extends beyond our outward appearance. The concept of artistic expression.
After reading the three sample essays, I have noticed something and that is they all had a common thing and that is they both were confused about their future .The authors each wrote about topics related to feeling alienated or not accepting something, such as sexuality, or having an impending deadline. Each piece was structured according to a chronological order. The authors of “Q” and “Lesbian” used their internal musings as a narrative device to demonstrate the characters’ inner struggles. This method of writing was especially effective in “Lesbian,” where the protagonist’s feelings of internalized homophobia and denial were clearly expressed through her dialogue and behavior. By highlighting the character’s internal dialogue, the story was able to delve deeper into the protagonist’s emotions.