By: Julissa Silva

From a baby’s first steps, to their first word, all of these are important milestones to an average person. For me, the most important one was when I learned how to read. Fantasy, Horror, Mystery, Fiction, Non-fiction. Everything that I could get my hands on, I read. I would read in my room, to the kitchen, even when I was sitting in the bathroom and would hide the books in the sink cabinet. And with reading, came writing. It was a way for me to get out all my frustrations, whether good or bad, into paper. I remember using books almost like a safety blanket when my parents would argue. I would feel safe as the pages wrapped around my skin, engulfing me in a sea of letters, heating up a burning desire to stay in those fantasy worlds. Without them, I don’t think I would’ve gone through most of the toughest times in my life. But at age 12, I disconnected from reading, due to me developing an eating disorder during middle school. I felt so broken without books, but I just couldn’t muster up the energy to read. The next four years were horrible for me. I had felt like I had lost my passion, my calling, my home. Like all of it was ripped away and I lost my sense of security. When someone would ask; “What is your talent?”, I would never know what to reply with. What was I really good at? My first thought was reading and writing of course. But what if I really wasn’t? What if it wasn’t enough? Then one day, in my senior year of high school, I came to an epiphany. Why was I trying so hard to reach this standard that was never forced upon me? In other words, who was I trying to impress? By doubting my abilities as a reader and a writer, I was loosing my passion for it. And I didn’t want that. So when college essay season approached, I wrote my heart out. I poured out the words that had been on the tip of my tongue for years and years, and when I finished, for the first time in my life I was actually satisfied. Time passed, and I got a letter in the mail one day. I had gotten an award and was expected to attend a ceremony that week. I was surprised, as I had not expected to win anything because of my medical absences in school. As the ceremony began, I sat down, anxiously waiting to see what my name was going to be called for. Surely, it wasn’t anything big. I kept biting my nails, anxiety and dread catching me by surprise when they suddenly called my name. I dragged my feet, forcing myself to walk across the stage, and stood there waiting to see what I had been awarded. “The Excellence in Writing award is presented to the senior girl who best fulfills the combined criteria of demonstrated service to her school, academic ability, and potential for future service to women in the solution of social and civic problems”. My heart leapt out of my chest, as I stood there in shock. For the first time in my life, I had been acknowledged as the skilled writer that I had always tried my best to be. Which is why I decided to take this class. I want to keep writing and explore new ways to improve. While I still have to pick up reading more, I hope to write more this semester.